Home > Dining, recap > Top Chef: lamest. cold. war. ever.

Top Chef: lamest. cold. war. ever.

I actually got pretty upset this week with Top Chef.  It started out simple enough, where the chefs were given exotic food items from emu eggs to duck liver which turned out to be duck testicles and everyone had a giggle at Angelo’s expense who chose the offending item.  Halfway through the quickfire challenge, Padma comes in and tells all the chefs to take the station to the right of them so now Kevin gets stuck with the duck testicles and Kelly has the emu egg.  I thought it was sort of a lame twist.  I actually wanted to see what the hell they could do with their dish.  Kelly ended up winning immunity by having an omelet with emu egg.  I love omelets so I was happy for her win.

The side drama: the guest judge is a competitor of Andreas.  Not cool.  Out of all the judges they could have gotten, they pluck one out with a conflict of interest with one of the chefs?  I understand that in the past sometimes people had previously worked under guest judges, but that relationship had ended by the time of the competition.  It wouldn’t be nice to have a chef with a current positive relationship and same goes with the negative.  What, nobody wants to play with Padma?

Then the elimination dish: to prepare a meal best served cold, hence cold wars.  They were in two different teams, Group A with Kenny, Kevin, Ed, Amanda, and Alex and Group B with Angelo, Tamesha, Tiffany, Andrea, and Stephen.  Each group would get to nominate someone for the win and someone for the loss.  Hmm…I wonder if there is going to be some strategy in play here?

We watch them cook and plan and be pissy and then the judging happens.  How long did it take Angelo to start attacking Kenny’s dish?  (Kenny’s not even that awesome anym0re!  I mean, he has the inflated of Angelo but sent to the bottom wayyyy too many times to justify it.  At least Angelo has only been there when HE HAD IMMUNITY.)  Angelo needs to think of a better enemy.  The group mostly votes against Kenny except for Andrea who points out that she got cartilage stuck in Amanda’s dish (which Alex had noticed and not bothered to mention).  Majority rules so Kenny is at the bottom.  Kevin is placed at the top despite being accused that it lacked acidity (though Tom was quick to point out that Kevin had indeed taken that into account when preparing the dish with lemons and tomatoes).

The second group comes in.  Everybody loves Tiffany’s dish – ahi tuna in gazpacho sauce – and she comes out on top.  Everyone else except for Andrea sorta sucked it seemed.  But they singled out Tamesha which made me smile because her attitude had been grating on me lately.  Her being sent to the bottom also makes the audience wonder if Angelo sabotaged her.  It doesn’t seem that he would do that to her this early in the game, but he was acting LIKE the executive chef and he made some bad calls about her dish.

So, Kenny whines and moans about how he’s only sent to the bottom because people are afraid of him.  Really?  How many times have you been sent here?  The guest judge ripped a new one for him.  Tamesha got ripped as well and for someone so young to be such an uppity little bitch on screen to get ripped like that was pleasurable.  I mean, seriously, at first she seemed like she was classy but then she just seemed to be a quieter, egomaniac with no record to prove it.  I’m the first person to say it could be editing by the TV people to have transformed her this way but in the end, you know you’re on camera, don’t talk about you’d kill another chef so easily WHEN YOU SUCK.  And part of becoming better is to admit when you make mistakes.  I don’t recall her doing that at all this season.  So Angelo’s little buddy got sent home.  Come back when you grow up.

But what really pissed me off?  No one, not even I’m-so-Asian-despite-not-being-sexy-Asian Angelo, tried sushi or sashimi.  I understand its actually very difficult to be trained in this arts but why is it on this show when I see a challenge best suited for Asian cooking, the best I see are Asian “influences?”  But seriously, when I think I want a cold dinner, I think I’m going to eat some sushi tonight.  (Actually, I really want to have sushi tonight!)  Can the judges shake things up and give them an Asian challenge?

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